How To Foster Peace In Our Children
Today more than ever the cultivation of peace internally is a necessity for the healthy development of our children.
When a child feels safe, respected, loved, nurtured and accepted, they thrive and feel themselves as worthy human beings. This raises their self-esteem and cultivates a more peaceful inner state of being.
As parents, there are certain conscious steps that we can take to cultivate and inspire peace in the hearts and minds of our children.
Try these simple techniques to help your child cultivate and strengthen their abilities to bring themselves to a calm and tranquil state of being.
Unconditional Acceptance.
Practice full acceptance of what is. Many times our kids become saddened because they didn’t get their way or something they really wanted to happen, just doesn’t work out the way they wished for. In those moments, we can hold space for our children to express their emotions by being there in a calm and centered state with trust that all is happening always the way it needs to. We can be the pillar of strength and trust in those moments so they can more successfully experience and process their upset. Once they calm down, we can make them aware that there is a higher force that is always working in our favor, and that if something doesn’t work out according to how we had hoped for, that we can look at those moments as opportunities to strengthen our faith in the Higher Order of things and that things always turn out for our highest good. What can you learn from this experience? It’s a great question to ask so that our children can reflect and learn from the experience. Unconditional acceptance always brings us a deep sense of inner-peace because we accept the Higher Order of things, and there fore, we can always feel calm and an overall sense of peace.
My daughter is now nine years old, and she has heard me say “trust that everything is always unfolding for your highest growth and evolution, even thought we may not agree with it, all the time.” When things don’t go exactly as she had hoped for, my daughter doesn’t become as angry or disrupted and is more resilient and better able to cope with her emotions, because she remembers that we are always being brought what is perfectly meant for us.
Embody Peace.
Gandhi said “Be The Change You Wish To See In The World.” If peace is what we desire to cultivate and inspire more in the lives of our children, then every parent can greatly benefit from embodying the most profound sense of inner peace that is available to our human experience. The only way to literally alter our physiology so that we are exuding relax, calm and tranquil brain wave states is to breathe with the primary muscle of inspiration, with the diaphragm. Here’s How: Align your spine so that you are in a neutral posture. Place your right hand on top of your lower belly. Inhale and expand your lower abdomen and chest when you inhale through the nose. Exhale allow your abdomen to return to neutral. Inhale and expand taking a deeper breath in. Feel the expansion and elongation, the feeling of expansion literally triggers in our body the relaxation or “peace” response in the body. Our nervous system calms down and activates in us our own inner healing center and spa. The more we practice and feel this type of breathing pattern, the more we will automatically become relaxed. Practice this type of breathing throughout your day, especially when you feel overwhelmed and stressed out, so that you break the cycle of stress and induce the peace response instead.
Experience feeling grateful and appreciative.
When we notice what we are grateful for throughout the day and appreciate ourselves daily, we literally trigger our relaxation and calm response in our nervous system. A practice that cultivates peace is when we time to give ourselves a hug a few times a day and also hug our child. We can say to ourselves and to them “I am so grateful for you, I am I am I am! Thank you for being you! Thank you for being exactly as you are. I love you exactly as you are!” This feels so uplifting. We can notice how saying this makes us feel like bringing even more awareness of inner peace. Some of us feel awkward giving ourselves accolades, or we don’t feel deserving of this type of appreciation. Saying this to ourselves while hugging ourselves is a great way to heal this and elevate our mood in case we have been a little too hard on ourselves. Too often as parents, we get so used to giving and over giving without remembering to first give to ourselves. The more we feel fulfilled inside, the easier and more joyful is our giving.
Live connected to the desires, joys and stirrings of your heart.
Our heart literally tells us what is aligned with our soul’s joy and purpose. The more we live connected and aligned with the true stirrings of our heart, the more peace we feel. When we go against what we truly desire or avoid acting on what is our true heart’s desire or soul’s purpose, the more our lives appear chaotic and stressful. When we align to our True Heart’s Desires and that which brings us joy and fill our lives up with activities that we are passionate about, the more we experience peace. When we stay connected to our heart and our feelings throughout the day, we live according to what we truly desire and we feel much more at ease. Here’s how: Place your hand over your heart throughout the day when you would like to decide on whether to do something. Ask yourself while your hand is placed over your heart “Is this what I truly desire? Is this True for me? Do I desire to do this?” Checking in with your heart first and foremost is a way of checking in with your soul and with the essence of who you are.
Many times we make decisions that are based on what other people want from us, or that we feel we need to do because of obligation or guilt. If this occurs, we are actually cheating on ourselves, we are not being honest with ourselves and what it is that we truly desire doing. Our bodies feel stressed when we ignore and abandon our true desires and what makes us feel joyful. This exercise will be very healing and we may need to forgive ourselves first for not listening honestly and honoring our true heart’s desires. Living connected to our heart brings an overall sense of peace and well-being.
Acknowledge and listen.
When we make time to turn off the phone and be present with ourselves and our child on a daily basis we are telling them, “you matter most to me, I love you and I respect you. I wish to be with you and share moments together with you.” This message is so healing and uplifting for our child who loves to feel loved and heard especially by us. We can make it a practice to look at our children’s eyes when we speak to them and listen with not only our ears, but with our hearts to what they say to us. When we take them in fully without trying to fix or correct them our children feel peace. When we do our best to hear our children simply for who they are, without trying to teach them something, the expand and feel their own space of who they are. It feels very empowering to be heard and in a loving and supportive, non-threatening way. Notice how peaceful both you and your child feel from the simple exercise of listening with an open heart.
Try these exercises daily with yourself and your child and notice how the energy of peace infuses your home. Our children learn much quicker from our own example and when we embody peace in every cell of our being, we create a space in our home for our children to also feel peace.
They feel our inner peace, they feel our acceptance, they feel our intentions to listen to them and respect them. This feels grounding and centered.
Let me know how these exercises benefit you and your child. Enjoy cultivating peace inside and outside. The whole world benefits!
Category: Parenting
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