Nutrition – Our First Meal

We had been fighting a lot. I can’t really be sure about what. We had gotten into some bad habits – eating junk food, ordering in, not eating many vegetables, and talking less. We put our work and our own individual stress ahead of our relationship, our health, and ourselves. Then one night on my way home from work, I decided that I needed a change.

I bought two pounds of tofu, carrots, and our favorite salad dressing. As soon as I got home I cut the tofu into cubes and tossed it with soy sauce, sesame oil, rice vinegar, lemon juice, grated carrots, and some sliced radishes that I had in the fridge. Then I headed outside to our small but mighty vegetable garden. Our lettuce greens, a mix of different kinds, were finally big enough. I remember, several weeks earlier, saying to him that they were just about ready to eat and he had said, not quite. I was disappointed. I felt impatient waiting for them to grow and worried that they would never get big enough, that somehow I would mess it up. Now they were ready.

I clipped almost all of the lettuce leaves. I also gathered some baby Swiss chard, pea shoots, and nasturtium. The smell of the freshly cut greens was pungent. You could actually taste sweet pea and spicy nasturtium in the air. Even my cat found them irresistible. I held out a nasturtium leaf while the cat took tiny bites of it, purring like a car engine. I washed all of the leaves in a giant bowl of water and watched with satisfaction as a dozen aphids, tiny bugs, floated away from the leaves. Life with the aphids was a daily battle, and I had finally surrendered to the idea that I could never kill them all no matter how much soap I sprayed on them. When it came time for me to eat the lettuce, all I had to do was rinse it and the aphids would be gone. I began to understand that they, the aphids, only wanted what I want: to eat and survive.

After rinsing the greens I dried them well and tossed them with a drizzle of salad dressing. I finished setting the table just as he walked in the door. I asked him if he was hungry, already knowing that he would be. We sat together and ate, mostly in silence, until he put down his fork and looked at me. He told me how grateful he was for this healthy food. Like me, he had been dissatisfied not only with the way we had been eating but also with the way we had been treating each other. He remarked about how good the food was, especially our salad greens. Then he said something that I will never forget, that this felt like our first meal, a fresh start, and a change for the better. The food we ate, our first home cooked meal in a while, healthy, and grown right in our backyard represented a change that we wanted to see in our relationship.

I started our vegetable garden out of curiosity. I learned how to make things grow. I battled the elements, learned to accept pests of all sizes, and most of all I learned that the vegetables I grew were no more mine than the bumble bees that pollinated them. More than growing lettuce and tomatoes, I was cultivating a healthy home. With that first meal, I was reminded that one healthy dinner can be the impetus for more positive changes. Don’t get me wrong, we have ordered pizza since then, but I don’t worry about it much because I know that a healthy meal is just outside our back door and that we can always return home.

Naima Bigby Sullivan, MS, RD

Naima Bigby Sullivan is the resident Nutritionist for Family Guiding. She is well known for her fabulous cooking and her unique approach to nutrition; she goes beyond prescribing diet and exercise plans, preferring to help her clients examine their relationships with food and their bodies. A former professional dancer, Naima has seen in her peers the anxiety, guilt, and shame that can be associated with food, especially among young women. Shifting focus to how we eat rather than fixating on “good” or “bad” foods, she helps individuals discover an intuitive way of eating to support a healthy and fulfilled life. Naima has been inspired by her work as a nutritionist and chef at a day program for adults and adolescents with eating disorders. In addition she has shared her wisdom with yogis, personal trainers and their clients, and co-manages a nutrition and food assistance program for HIV+ adults. Naima is a passionate dancer, an inspired chef, and an effective nutritionist changing the lives of those she serves.

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Category: Nutrition